“You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world. Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. “- Lucille Ball
This weekend my step-mom and I shared a laugh as she jovially mentioned all the ways I march to the beat of my own drum. She was predominately referencing my unique parenting styles. Until my son Durant was one year old, we bathed him in the kitchen sink, where we would also feed him baby food before he was able to eat solids. Yes, this is bizarre — but he was happy, I was not stressed and it worked for us. Now, twenty-five months old, he loves being naked and so I let him run free inside the house. Thankfully, he tells me when he needs to go “tee-tee.” When he does, I take him to the bathtub where he has an obviously large target. Yes, this is also not mainstream, but currently the toilet freaks him out. Eventually, we’ll make our way to the porcelain bowl, but until then I’m okay with ‘breaking the rules’ and will not think twice otherwise.
Next, and along the same lines, I recently saw an interview with the famous decorator, Nate Berkus. He referenced the importance of being confident enough to break decorating rules. In other words, just because a decorating book or article shows one opinion doesn’t mean you have to accept it. Rather, what’s most important is that you love what you have, that it reflects your style and that it makes you happy. All other opinions are irrelevant.
So, you are probably wondering where in the world am I going with a my weird parenting and decorating analogy…well, it’s all about loving yourself and being confident enough to go against the grain, break societal norms and follow your heart. For example, Nate also talked about making the mistake of accepting a television show offer, which naturally fed his ego and was of course financially rewarding; however, if he had initially taken the time to listen to and follow his heart he would have heard his spirit saying, “break the career ladder rules and say no.” As a result, he quickly became overwhelmed, his life spun out of control and his health was negatively effected.
Listening to and following your heart is tricky, especially in the fast-paced, over-stimulating and impulsive world we live in. It’s hard to turn down anything that may instantaneously feed our ego, provide a quick fix or appease everyone other than ourselves, and frankly, it’s not popular to say no. Personally, I cringe anytime I have to say no, even when I listen to my heart and am convicted in my decision (big or small). But, I’m figuring out that sometimes loving myself means saying no, and I’m okay with that, even if it means that my decision upsets or disappoints someone I deeply care for.
So, how will you break the rules and love yourself first? There are a million and one ways, but only you hold the key to your heart and can determine what is best for you and your life. I’m confident you’ll choose the habits, behaviors and choices that will positively feed your body, your mind, your spirit and then the lives of everyone around you.
Point To Ponder:
Do your daily habits, behaviors and choices reflect love for yourself, or love for everyone other than yourself?
Make a list of the habits, behaviors and choices you engage in that are in direct opposition to loving yourself. Then, create a list of all the self-loving habits, behaviors and choices that you will begin making a priority.